Wednesday, March 08, 2006
what NOW ?
jus ended the conversation with abeely on the phone.
i think its reali weird.
these few days its him tht initiate a conversation.
asked me to called him jus now.
initially i don wan to.
but i guess i jus need to know someting.
so i called him.
anw, his gf broke up with him bcos she lost felings for him.
and he added, : i think tis is my fair retribution.
walau when i heard this, i so wanna cry.
but then i said, : eh don talk abt this.
and i immediately changed the subject.
i mean i dono what to say if thats the subject la.
everything is so like before.
the craps we said.
his same old laughter.
OMG.
i so wanna cry now.
i miss his laughter so much.
THAT laughter.
even when u hear it, u'll join in and laugh.
the same old saying "lame shit, act cute and all that"
everything is seriously back to before.
i so miss him.
but yet i am so reluctant to go back to him even if he ask.
not that i don love him
but i felt that he is a diff abeely i know.
a Abeely whom broke my heart once.
whom i once trust but end up i took it back.
i so don understand the situation im in now.
he is like leadin me on.
but yet it don seem that way.
i felt that i stil love him but yet i don wan to go back to him.
WHAT THE HELL.
why am i stuck in this ?
should i jus continue or jus reali seriously move on ?
i so wanna cry, i reali wanna cry but yet i felt my tears are adi dry up.
should i stil hang on ?
its easy to say but its not easy to do it.
ABEELY ABEELY ABEELY.
sigh.
the converstion jus now was great like before.
serious, that 25 mins.
this time, i made him laugh. =)
-gone
m e s m e r i s e d 1:36 AM
